Wedding Planning Blues on a Rainy Day!

Perhaps part of my mood is due to the rainy, dreary weather that we've had for several days. I think it's more to the fact that a girl (of any age) shouldn't have to plan her wedding without her mother.

I went to David's Bridal a few months ago and bought my dress. I went alone. If my mother couldn't be with me, I didn't want anyone with me. Today, the girls and I went back to David's for our dress fittings. I would have gone alone today also, but it would save me trip to have the girls get fitted on the same day. It may have helped me to have my girls with me. I think they kept me busy enough not to have a complete meltdown. I'm home now and all I want to do is crawl in bed and cry.

I'm not sure if I'll be able to handle the actual wedding day without my Mother. I am barely coping now. There are so many times that I want to pick up the phone and call her only to realize that I can't. I do still have her cell phone number in my phone. I've thought of dialing it many times, but I don't know what my reaction would be if the number was now answered by someone else.

Mom, I really miss you.